If your LIBIDO has left the chat … this is for you

If your LIBIDO has left the chat … this is for you

Libido is one of those deeply human experiences that shifts quietly in the background of our lives, yet many people feel worried when it changes. When stress rises or life feels overwhelming, desire often drops - and for many, that drop becomes stressful in itself. It’s easy to wonder, “Why is my libido so low?” or “What’s wrong with me?” But the truth is far gentler: your body is responding exactly the way a healthy, sensitive body responds. Stress influences hormones, hormones influence mood and energy, and your menstrual cycle adds its own natural rhythm on top of everything else. None of this is a failure. 

Your menstrual cycle already creates a landscape of shifting sensations. Some days you feel energized and open; other days you feel tender, tired, or inward. Hormones rise and fall throughout the cycle, shaping how connected you feel to your body and how much desire you experience. When stress enters the picture - whether it’s emotional strain, work pressure, lack of sleep, or simply too much on your mind - your body prioritizes rest and safety over sexual desire. This isn’t a sign of dysfunction. It’s a sign that your nervous system is doing exactly what it’s designed to do.

It’s no surprise that so many people search online for phrases like “low libido all of a sudden,” “does stress affect libido,” “low libido during period,” or “how hormones affect desire.” These questions come from a place of worry, but the answers are often surprisingly reassuring. Libido isn’t a fixed trait or a measure of health, attractiveness, or relationship quality. It’s a fluid response to your internal and external world. When you understand that, the pressure around desire begins to soften.

Your cycle plays a role too. During menstruation, energy may dip and your body may crave comfort more than intimacy. As estrogen rises after your period, you might feel lighter and more open. Around ovulation, desire often peaks naturally. And in the days before your next period, when progesterone rises and emotions can feel heavier, you may want closeness of a different kind - emotional, gentle, or simply quiet. These patterns are normal, and they vary from person to person. There is no “correct” way to feel.

When stress overlaps with these hormonal shifts, your libido may feel unpredictable. That unpredictability can be frustrating, but it’s not a sign that anything is wrong. It’s simply your body responding to life. Instead of asking, “Why am I like this?” you can ask, “What do I need right now?” Sometimes the answer is rest. Sometimes it’s connection. Sometimes it’s space. Sometimes it’s comfort and for many people, feeling physically comfortable during their period makes a huge difference.

The most important thing to remember is that you don’t need to force your libido to behave a certain way. You don’t need to compare yourself to anyone else or meet any expectation - not society’s, not a partner’s, not your own past self. When you offer yourself patience and kindness, the tension around desire often softens on its own. Not because you “fixed” anything, but because you stopped fighting yourself.

Low libido doesn’t mean you’re broken. It means you’re human. And you deserve to meet yourself with the same compassion you offer others. When you stop judging yourself for having a low libido moment or phase, you make room for something softer: understanding, comfort, and a deeper sense of trust in your own body. And that trust is far more powerful than any “perfect” libido could ever be.